"Love your neighbors as yourself." Mark 12:31

Today Astrel's Grandpa died and I knew it before the sun rose.  In Haiti you are very close to you neighbors, both physically and emotionally.  You are really more like an extended family and most the time they are indeed third, forth and fifth cousins.  Always just referred to as cousins in Haiti.  I have been trying for awhile to relate this kind of living to anything we have in the United States.  It came to me the other day.  It is like living in a large apartment building with no doors.  Like no outside door to your apartment.  Not that we don't have doors in Haiti but you don't have windows, that shut out any kind of noise.  So everything going on with your close neighbors you can hear.

This is how I knew about the death in the 'neighborhood' before I had even gotten out of bed.  In Haiti when someone dies they cry out.  Maybe wailing is what we would call it.  Its the third time now I have experienced it.  You are literally woken up to moaning and screams throughout the mountainside.  It is heart wrenching.  And then you wonder who is it?  In what direction is it coming from?  The family was immediately up and out checking on who it was.  Although they thought they knew already because Astrel's Grandpa was sick.  As I laid there in bed I just lifted up a prayer for the family for peace and condolences.  When you are with your neighbors like this, there is a bonding that happens that is unlike any other experience.

I thought I might compare it to a church family.  Which I am blessed to have an amazing one in Vermillion as well as the 'exteneded' family of the United Methodist Church in the Dakotas Conference.  But even that is something you only experience once a week or once a year.  Everyday I greet the neighborhood from my porch as they go to and from school and work.  Sometimes even before I brush my teeth or while I am outside in my front yard brushing my teeth.

Before I moved back to the states this was one of the things that drove me crazy.  I had to deal with the young men in the neighborhood dropping by for coffee before I even headed out to use the bathroom in the morning.  But now I don't know something has changed. (I have a backdoor now so I can at least use the bathroom without everyone knowing.)  But also, I love seeing the people and sharing their lives.  And just as I am writing this one of my neighbors a second cousin once removed stopped by.  They didn't make supper at his house tonight so we shared what we had leftover with him and his son.

Somehow it seems there is always enough to go around in the neighborhood.  Thank you Jesus for helping me understand the loafs and fishes a little better.  And there it is the leftover rice was just brought back into the house.  Mesi Jesi for teaching me to love my neighbors.

Clearing my head.

I went for a walk this morning.  My husband has been wound up a lot about life.  He now knows how difficult it is to live in 2 countries.  The baby was crying and I needed to a break.  I went for a walk to clear my head.  There was this beautiful view over the mountain just a short distance away.  I needed to just sit and clear my head.  I found a lovely rock on the side of the mountain.  I passed several people on the way there - folks heading to church.  We exchanged 'Bonjou' and both kept on our way.  I found a spot on the side of the mountain where is is rocky to sit.  I sat there looking down the valley and at the mountains wondering, 'what am I doing here?'  I needed to clear my head;  it has been a stressful time.  So alone on the rock I watched the world and talked to God.  The leaves below suddenly stirred up in a whirlwind.  The yellow leaves from the tree on the side of the hill danced in the sunlight.  And I kept talking to God and smiled a bit at the Creator's response.  

I heard something behind me and turned.  It was one of those moments you wish you had a camera.  Hand in hand walking there were 2 small children.  One a little girl about 8 years old carrying one of those large flat baskets on her head with bean shells in it and the other a little boy about 2 years old that was just wanting to hang out with his big sister.  He was along to help.  They greeted me and kept walking across the edge of the field.  They dumped their basket in the garden and on the way back the little boy had the basket (that was almost bigger that him) on his head upside down.  He clearly wanted to help out his big sister with the job at hand.  Again so wish I would have had the camera.

I continued to sit and clear my head, but shortly after the children had disappeared over the hill an old lady came and greeted me.  "Ou bezwen sole?" she asked me 'You need sun?'  ...Yes sure that sounded like a good reason to explain what I was doing here on the side of a mountain by myself.  I also tried to explain I just needed time by myself to think.  Which most people may take as a cue to keep walking, not the case in Haiti.  She kept talking to me about life and hwo she was and then she said, "Mwen genyen sole kay mwen." 'I have sun at my house!'  She really wanted me to come to her home.  We chatted a bit longer and then she said it again.  I was convinced I probably needed to go.  

Her house was just beside me on the hill.  And when I got to here house I discovered that the 2 young kids were her grandchildren as well as 1 more child there.  Their mother had died and she was caring for them.  We visited for a little bit and ten she brought me a letter in English that was addressed to her grand-daughter.  It was a sponsorship for her schooling from an international organization.  It was a lovely little letter and I was happy to translate it for her.  We visited about the sponsorship and I am not sure her granddaughter is actually sponsored or at least they have received no money for her.

They wanted to make some coffee for me.  But I really needed to get back to my house.  Ass I had now been gone for some time to clear my head.  As I walked back home, I thought my head is clear but I am not sure why.  The oldest boy from the house came running up behind barefooted and asking me for sandals.  I explained I didn't have any, this is pretty common thing for small children to ask for from foreigners.  

As I continued to walk home I just thought again about God.  What am I doing here?

I know this is a question many missionaries ask themselves from time to time. The experience is amazing, but there are many things that are rough from time to time about daily living.  So you find yourself asking the question.  I hope many people ask themselves that from time to time just to stay on track with what God wants from us in our lives.  It has now a few days later - I feel on track; despite still having a water shortage.  One of the artisans came by with some beautiful crafts and the rooster is crowing and all is well with the world.

Reality of life in Haiti - not a vegetarian read

There was a sweet little bunny in the corner of the kitchen the other day.  My first thought was just that ‘awe how cute! A fuzzy little rabbit just like in Elijah’s book I read him.  Then I realized oh….oh no.  I knew I needed to go get the camera to get a picture of this little guys last moments on earth.  

But I was busy myself cooking in the kitchen.  I had forgot about the little furry critter, until I could hear a buzz of people outside the house.  Then I knew it was too late to take a picture.  The neighborhood of friends had gotten wind that the rabbit would soon be ready. 

not the bunny one of the pigs

TiBo my brother-in-law is sort of known for ‘cooking up the meat’.  And when he does, he shares with whomever comes over.

In the kitchen -heads up!

One day I was busy looking around for something in the kitchen, not taking in my surroundings.  I stood up from where I had been searching and nearly smacked my head on a chunk of pig!  Since I have been in Haiti there have been 2 pigs and a rooster and the rabbit, he has cooked.  I am also pretty sure probably a cat – Raphael brought a bowl of meat into the house one night but that time he didn’t mention sharing it with me.  Of course it could have just been spicy too.  Which by the way is the case with most of the meat, I usually don’t eat any because it is too spicy! 

I did try the rabbit and it wasn’t too bad but all I could see was his cute little fuzzy face eating his last carrot in the corner of the kitchen and I couldn’t eat another bite.  You may be horrified or maybe you have lived on a farm and this is just the cycle of life.  I know for myself it is just the way it works here and life as we know it in Haiti.  But I gotta tell you when I catch wind of them cooking up the next piece of meat.  I try and stay clear of the kitchen or the crowd that is gathered around the excitement.  I wait inside; then I too can enjoy my share of the tasting when it is hot and cooked and on a plate. 

 I had to post this today.  Because I saw TiBo heading out into the field today with 2 big knifes in his hands.  I think we will be having some pork later today.

What am I going to “DO” when I am in Haiti?!

This is what I have been asking myself and asking myself, for the past year knowing we would be returning to Haiti again.  And others have asked me that.  I also need to know so that I can define why I am requesting money to help support myself and my family living there.  As Americans we always have to be busy doing stuff!  Many people work 8-5 and then fill their lives with so many things they are always busy!  Well nothing has come to me on what I should be ‘doing!’….well not exactly.

One of my favorite movies ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ talks about this (I have also read the book).In Italy they have a word for the art of doing nothing - “Il bel far niente”   In trying to figure how to express this I looked up some articles and blogs.  This is from ‘bemorewithless’ http://bemorewithless.com/how-to-cultivate-dolce-far-niente/

“We have to let go of the guilt for not planning, producing and consuming.  While this may be cultural, I think people around the world experience the pressure to measure the success of their day by what they’ve accomplished. If that is the case for you, it’s time for a new measuring system. Instead of number of appointments you’ve made, rooms you’ve cleaned, miles driven or shopping accomplished, try measuring your day by the number of times you smiled about nothing, watched the grass grow, or measure success by how long it took you to linger over dinner.”

The idea that keeps coming back to me is ‘being with the people’.  I have spoke on Haiti many times, sharing a variety of stories.  But the story and team that stick out the most was a few moms from the United States that wanted to come and just ‘be’ with the moms of Haiti.  The BIG thing they wanted to accomplish while coming to Haiti was to live the life of a mom in Haiti.  And so we did. We went to about 3 different family houses and just spent time with one other.  I am sure that sounds a bit strange to you.  Or you may be thinking is that All they did?  Well the Haitians thought the same thing.  “They just want to hang out with me and do laundry and dishes with me?”  But there was so much value in this.  1^st of all everyone were equals and these Haitian moms felt that what they do everyday is important and they were were given validation.  Also the American moms learned a tremendous amount from this experience that I am sure is with them still today.

           

So right now I am working through the idea that I won’t be ‘DOING’ some BIG thing.  But my plan is to be with the people and learn.  My plan is to be a mom and experience what it is like to have a baby in Haiti.  My plan is to explore my own artwork at my house and invite my Haitian artist friends to come create with me.  My plan is to learn more about the countryside and people and what it is to really ‘live’ in Haiti from day to day.  Trying very hard to not feel ‘guilty for not planning, producing and consuming….or accomplishing something.” And try and measure my day by the number of times not only I smile about something but how many times someone else smiles with me. 

            One of the goals (because lord knows we do in fact have to be doing something!), is to share these experiences with you, that we might all learn from these experiences.  I hope to invite you on this journey of exploration with me. 

The other day I was working through this in my head on how it all would work and struggling.  But I had the opportunity to share with the local United Methodist Women about the women and children in Haiti over coffee.  One of the ladies was in awe that I would do something like this.  Just give up things like a washing machine and just live with the people.  It was what I needed to hear!  To me it isn’t that big of deal, (it is but it isn’t) and if I can tell the story so others can experience another culture I am more than happy to do just that!  It makes me smile, it made those ladies smile and I hope this makes you smile!

What's in a name?

It is so important to know people's names and parents take great efforts in choosing their babies' name.   I have been thinking about this a lot lately ready to name my own baby. They say your name is your favorite word.  It sounds a little self-centered maybe, but it is attached to our identity - it is part of who we are.

In January of 2014, I helped lead the team from Peace Lutheran Church from Sioux Falls, SD with Helping Hands for Haiti.  The church has been connected to Haiti for many years and makes a voyage down to the little island every January.  It is rather a nice to time to go in January in the Dakotas.


Half the team was people who had already been to Haiti and couldn't wait until the day we went to Jumelle to see the smiling faces of all the children they met the year before.  One of the gentlemen on our team, Brian was looking forward to seeing one particular face Bebe.  He had found a special place in his heart for Bebe the year before as she has a glowing smile, it would seem you can almost see her pure heart of gold and she is maybe a little mischieveous.  Brian may see himself in her a bit.  However, Bebe also happens to be deaf and mute.





This could be a challenge to overcome in any country.  In the United States people who are born deaf or become deaf later in life have amazing opportunities.  There are schools specifically for the deaf, there is assistance within the public school systems and medical resources to help.  However, in a county like Haiti where your 'average' person struggles to survive there are more obstacles for a person who is deaf.

I appreciated hearing the compassion of the team and especially Brian of this young woman.  I also shared with them her name was not Bebe.  The group was all surprised.  But in Haiti almost everyone who is unable to speak is called Bebe because this is the word for baby.  The next day Brian was on a mission to find out this young ladies name.  It is Celentcia.  They also met many of her family members and learned one of her brothers is deaf and another is hard of hearing.  It was great to reach out to the family.

I am always excited when a new team arrives in Haiti.  Each person has their own gifts and graces in this life and if we can find a way to share those talents, where there is a need - that is where I think God exists and really shines!  This group from Peace Lutheran had a couple unique individuals on the trip. Kayla and Tyler both grew up with English being their 2nd language.  This seems a little atypical in Sioux Falls, SD.  But it probably isn't what you think - their first language was sign language.  Both of Kayla's and Tyler's parents are deaf.

This lent to a particularly beautiful moment in Jumelle, Haiti.  Everyday while most of the team was working with all the children on a Vacation Bible School; Kayla having a real heart for people, sat down with Celentcia and started working with her on learning sign language.

While the others were working with some locals on building furniture for the school.  Kayla and Celentcia worked on the alphabet and colors in sign language.  We spent 4 days there at the school and by the end of the week it seemed Celentcia had learned her colors.  It was exciting for the whole team to check the progress.  Not only that but the local children were amazed at what Celentcia had learned.  They had assumed because she was deaf she couldn't learn as well as the other children.  You could see that Celentcia had a lot more confidence too.  The other children were calling her by her name Celentcia and not just Bebe.

The last day of the week we had a large celebration.  There was a variety of games for all the children. We painted finger nails, taught baseball, played soccer, shared new games of bean bag toss and ladder golf, and played with the parachute.  As well as little hand slapping games.  Such as you see below.






You get in a circle and slap the persons hands next to you, while you sing a song.  If the song ends and your hand is the last slapped you are out. Celentcia not only had the confidence and support of her peers to participate but she ended up winning the game!  It was beautiful.
         






A month later another team went down with Helping Hands for Haiti and delivered books for Sign Language and flash cards to continue to help Celentcia and her family.  One of the members of that team, the pastor of the church also knew Sign Language and could communicate some with Celentcia.
It was a continued moment of grace.

Drinking Water

Sometimes water is a challenge at my house.  Actually this is probably a huge understatement in general about the water in Haiti.  This is bathing water and drinking water.  I buy drinking water in 5 gallon jugs from Jacmel which is a city that is a half hour down the mountain on a bad rocky dirt road about 1/2 hour.  The family that I stay with, often share the water too, at least for the little one.  Often times it is gone before I realize it. Sometimes it has been a day or two until I could buy some more.  I don’t go without, I drink local filtered water which is safe – but really does not taste very good.  Or I go to neighbor's house and borrow some or buy bags of water or a bottle in the street ‘downtown’ Mizak.  But we get by and then go and buy some more in the city; lugging a 5 gallon jug up the mountain tied to the back of the motorcycle.  “Se la vi” That's life.
So say a little prayer when you experience this - it really is a blessing!

On the way home, God hit me with inspiration....with a flat tire.

On Sunday, Raphael and I drove to Sioux Falls to be there while the group that I went to Haiti with in January presented to their church about their experiences.  It is always a great joy to be with folks who have a mutual love for Haiti and also to share about experiences in Haiti.

On the way home, God hit me with inspiration.  Just as we pulled onto the interstate I heard a strange noise.  It sounded like something was banging up against the side of the car.  We pulled over, I opened my door, and there it was; the back tire was flat.  We were now on the interstate, pulled over to the side of the road.  I have changed tires before, so we stepped outside.  It was VERY COLD!  The wind was blowing - to make that cold cut through you like glass.  Car after car went whipping by us.  It reminded me of a blog, my friend Lee shared about the differences between people helping you on the side of the road in Haiti vs. the U.S. http://thegreenmangoblog.com/2013/02/23/car-troubles/ and I thought no one is going to stop so we better get to it.  (In Haiti someone would have already stopped and a dozen more people would have asked if everything was ok.)

                Most the time when I pull over with road problems, I end up getting help; one of those advantages of being a woman I will take.  But Raphael was out there with me, so I had no hope of anyone stopping.  We got the tire and the jack out.  Then had to take a break inside the car, it was so cold!  Finally we stepped back out and Raphael was under  the car, trying to find a spot for the jack.  All of a sudden, I see an older man with long wild crazy greyish hair blowing in the wind walking toward us.  My first thought is he looked like a man who could have been living out of the his car.  I looked at his car and he had a woman in the seat beside him and a bumper sticker indicating he might be a Veteran.  I felt bad for being judgmental but just as in 'giving' the people who are most likely to help are those that have been there.

                He immediately grabbed a ‘real jack’ (instead of the crappy ones that come with the car) and started helping Raphael.  After giving Thanks and more thanks; I wrapped my scarf around Raphael .  I was going to wait in the car and let the men handle it (after all I had a skirt on).  When I thought they were about done, I popped out of the car again – thanking the man profusely!  He let us know the ‘donut tire’ was low and the Canton exit was only two miles down the road, we could get air there.  Next thing that happened; Raphael looked up at the tall crazy haired stranger and said “HUG!” in his heavy accented English.   It brought tears to my eyes.  The gentleman then said, “I don’t normally stop for people anymore but God said maybe I needed to this time.” 

“God Bless You!”  Raphael and I both said.

                As we proceeded back on the interstate going 45 miles an hour with our hazards on, I found this new found stranger (our Angel) following us also going 45.  Now this is what the Haitian would have done – gone one step above and beyond.  You might get lucky and find a stranger to help you.  You might even be that stranger that helps someone.  But do you go the extra 2 miles at 45 (when you could be going 75) and take the exit with this stranger you decided to help just to make sure they got on their journey.  Our Angel came over to the car and told us where the air pump was at the gas station.  We both exchanged “God bless You’s” and then he headed back to the interstate.  A stranger, an angel that blessed us that day and made a difference in 2 people’s lives; not only changing a tire – but by helping restore my faith in humanity.